Well at least that’s what I take away from a Monster.com article that re-terms “cowboy” with “ranch or farm manager.”

The only explanation I can think of for this modification is that the connotations of “cow” for “fat” and “boy” for “young” offended an overweight man with an inferiority complex.  If this was just a sexist issue, why not just use “cowperson?”  Or did Nickelodeon already copyright that term for a cartoon?

Whatever the reasoning behind this change, it’s not just the occupation formerly known as cowboy that will be affected.

For those aspiring to be country singers, remember that you will need to fit in two extra syllables now when lyrically describing the men of the West.  Good thing The Dixie Chicks peaked in the 90’s.  “Farm manager take me away” somehow doesn’t strike as romantic a chord. 

And for those planning on being politically and professionally correct parents, you better make sure it’s “Ranch managers and Native Americans” your kids are playing at recess.

Inspired by “10 Cool Jobs and What They Pay.”  By Dona DeZube.  http://content.comcast.monster.com.  May 5, 2008.

Truby Takeaway:  Becoming a drug lord, holding hostages for ransom, cooking the books - all strategies to get rich, all guaranteed to corrupt.  We of course know this and most of us will opt for another plan to make out like a Rockefeller - working hard and being smart.  But how can we be sure that the right means will lead to a right end?  “There Will Be Blood” exposes the highly vulnerable ego of humankind.  Even the oil man who worked his way up the ladder, literally, from the bottom of the well to the top of the rig, through sheer passion and persistence - he is still at risk for conscience corruption.  As is the boomtown’s self-appointed prophet.  As is the man who had nothing more than the clothes on his back and a blood relation to a tycoon.  As is you.  As is I.  As is everyone.

Okay, the reality is that “The Apprentice” star is marketing his clothing line.  If his application for a trademark is approved, he will have sole privileges to print “You’re Fired” on clothing, and the right to block other designers from accessorizing their fashion with his phrase.

I still think we should celebrate – for the future of our work wear.  First of all, the fewer designers entitled to put that phrase on clothing, the better.  And second, I for one am just grateful that The Donald isn’t launching a hair care line.

So who has the last laugh now at former Governor Eliot Spitzer?   His Wall Street targets, his white collar convicts, Republican radio show hosts, and even us Trubys???

HA HA – Hold it!  Thanks to public confessionals from the new New York Governor David Paterson about his past affairs and drug use and to Detroit’s latest setback involving Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick’s infidelity, perjury, and incessant text messaging, we see that the nation’s top leaders are vulnerable.  And whether we want to admit it or not, we are too.

The reality is that the wrong decision will be easy to make throughout our careers.  Sometimes we won’t know we’re doing wrong at the time.  I, for one, swear I had no idea that a blinking red light was code for “Feed me any more paper and I’ll die.”  Unfortunately, my decision to continue the task at hand resulted in a company casualty.  RIP Shredder. 

Other times we’ll know what we’re doing isn’t right.  It always seems to start off innocently – we expense a beer tab that really wasn’t business related or we indulge in flirtatious conversation with a blind eye to the ring finger.  But such activity can grow beyond our control and pretty soon we might be no better than the corporate tycoons who cook the books or the politicians who allocate tax dollars towards the cause of call girls.

So I’ll suspend my judgment for now and instead admire Eliot Spitzer for stepping down immediately in the interest of the people of New York.  Plus, anything I say here is subject to being hypocritical.  I still have an entire career ahead to make mistakes in…

This is the good gateway drug!  Caffeine allows us to maintain our youth staying up late, and then function in full the next morning alongside our seniors!  Without putting our lives in jeopardy!  And the only side effect seems to be overdosing on the exclamation point!

Well, not exactly.  Caffeine is a cover-up.  WAKE UP AND HEAR THE EXPERTS!

EXPERT #1:  Dr. Charles Czeisler, Director of Sleep Medicine for Harvard Medical School, advises that if you only sleep four or five hours a night, your performance level will be that of someone who’s been awake for 24 hours.  

EXPERT #2:  Christopher Drake, Senior Scientist with the Henry Ford Sleep Disorders and Research Center, validates exactly what we were taught in grade school – “the human body needs approximately seven to eight hours of sleep to maintain optimal alert levels during the day.”  But he goes on to dispel the myth that many accomplished people operate fine off of a four or five hour sleep.  “Imagine how much more brilliant and productive they would have been if they’d gotten more sleep.”

There’s the clincher.  As both a night owl and early bird – we think we’re going to build the ultimate nest egg.  And we are, in fact, winging it thanks to caffeine.  But how much higher could we be flying?

We won’t know for sure until we open our eyes to shutting them… three or so more hours each night.
 

Inspired by “Learning to Live Like an Early Bird” by Melinda Beck.
 The Wall Street Journal.  Tuesday, March 4, 2008.

I don’t think anyone needs experience in the business world, consumer world, or world in general to understand this one.  The only thing I don’t understand is how a deal like this even approached the table.  I couldn’t even imagine the table these two companies would come together at.

A simple search on the Sears website for “table” will yield a page of 20 tables  - 17 air hockey/ foosball tables and 3 dining room tables, starting at $249.99.  That same exact search conducted on the Restoration Hardware site yielded a page of 10 tables - all bearing titles including a synonym for “wealth” or a luxurious travel destination (i.e. Estate Coffee Table, Hamptons End Table), as well as 2 table lamps, one priced at $500.00.

The Sears and Restoration Hardware homepages showcase quite a mismatch as well.  Restoration Hardware features a lavish poolside chair surrounded by the pristine green of an untouched mountain range.  The only prop that appears to be missing from this scene is a service bell.  Meanwhile Sears looks like they uploaded a picture taken accidentally in a garage where the only green comes from four potted plants.  The place is so filled with tool chests and landscaping implements that one can only assume this is the service entrance to the set of Restoration Hardware’s photo shoot.

Is this an anti-Sears tirade?  Absolutely not.  I’ll be checking out with them for Fathers Day, trust me.  I just don’t see the connection or strategy behind their buyout offer. 

Restoration Hardware didn’t either.  They took up a deal with private equity firm Catterton Partners instead.  Now their website definitely resonates with Restoration Hardware.  That table pictured on the homepage - you think it’s straight from the Greenwich Collection?

Sources:
www.sears.com
www.restorationhardware.com
http://www.cpequity.com/

If you’re reading this in Morocco, here’s a warning.  A 26 year-old computer engineer was arrested, and allegedly beaten, for impersonating Prince Moulay Rachid on a Facebook account.

Needing background on this news story, I went straight to my trusted information sources.  First, I pulled up the Prince’s Google Images file.  I couldn’t help but wonder what was so impressive about his face to fraudulently post it on Facebook.  Then I found a timeline of the Prince’s life on Wikipedia: son of a King, studied International Politics, acted as a Diplomat - pretty standard - any Disney prince could have provided that material.  Reading on however, I did find that his royal highness was a hero via one extremely unique course.  Wikipedia states verbatim: “In 2000 under the brave leadership of Prince Moulay Rachid was founded Hassan II golf Trophy Association.”  I sure hope he survived that feat without too bad a handicap.

Joking aside, this is a serious matter.  We who grew up during the Internet boom in democratic societies must be careful.  We now have the ability to broadcast our jokes to the masses BUT THE MASSES HAVE THE ABILITY TO SEE THEM!  It’s not just about taking down that picture of you doing a keg stand so that your boss doesn’t see it.  It’s about controlling anything that goes out into cyberspace from your IP address.  Cyberspace is border-free but full of citizen-censors. 

Of course we can still have fun.  There are plenty of safe alternatives to joking on the web - so be clever!  If you just HAVE to impersonate someone in Morocco on Facebook, scroll down to the Favorite Quotes section and write:

            “Here’s looking at you kid.” 
                - Humphrey Bogart, Casablanca

This year was different though.  I was at work on February 2nd before the groundhog even woke up.  Yet he was the one with an entire square devoted to him on the calendar?  And then we’re supposed to applaud him for going back to bed?  Hail to him as the chief expert on nature?  The varmint can’t even stand up to his own shadow! 

Then came Valentine’s Day.  I’m single and apparently 25 is the cut-off age for my dad to send sympathy flowers so we’re skipping this one.

Mardi Gras and Presidents Day are selective holidays - only those employed in New Orleans or by the government were eligible for celebration.  SKIP!

So I can’t help but question why the one day this month that gives something of incomparable value to everyone - no matter their job, region, relationship status, or species - goes completely ignored?  This valuable something is the one thing we all need more of.  The one thing we can never have enough of.  And this Friday, we get it - TIME!  An entire extra day!

Is the Leap Year not reason to rejoice?  Think about it.  How could you spend an extra 24 hours!?  What will you do with this precious time that comes only once every four years!?

Okay, so maybe we’ll all wind up doing exactly what we do every other day of the year.  Hey - that’s a whole lot more than the groundhog can say of his day.  So take a minute - you’ve got an extra 1440 this year - and celebrate to yourself!  As with most holidays, it’s the thought that counts anyway, right?

The day started off strong at our weekly 7:30 am sales meeting.  We all showed up.  At 8:30 am, we took a field trip to Starbucks.  At 11:30 am, three of us called an impromptu meeting to discuss the onset of enjoying country music.  1:00 pm called for a very leisurely lunch at the favored deli.  And the rest of the afternoon we took turns DJ-ing our favorite tunes.

Were we unproductive?  No, we finished everything we had to do that day with time to spare.

So what is the point?  A company’s leaders hinder its efficiency?  Anarchy should rule after all? 

The point is that if we were any older and had any more experience, even with time to sit around and music to play and useless conversation to have, we probably wouldn’t do it.  We might be out on the golf course with our friends or stopping in with lunch for our spouse or being there after school to pick up our children.  The older you get, the more you have to lose and therefore the less time you have to waste.

No other time in our life will be confined to our office with no one watching - we had no choice but to have fun with each other.  We had to be there but we could be casual.  At entry level, we can afford to waste time because as far as we know we have a lot of it.  Honor your lack of experience.  But be sure to mark your Outlook calendar for three to four years from now you’ll want to know when you should start holding on to your dwindling time clock.

I recently discovered, however, that not all entry levelers are seated equally.  One week ago our newest employee came over to my desk asking me to order him a new chair.  Sitting in my non-reclining rolley without arm rests, I threw the wheels into a rugged reverse and grabbed the office supplies book.  Citing his bad back, “The Chair Man” chose a $234 head-high leather seat with padded arms, swivel, tilt tension, and pneumatic adjustment - yes, the chair came with its own vocabulary.

It was three hours into work today that The Chair Man came over to my desk and asked when his chair was coming in because “that one sucks!”  What he did not know was that after he had left the office last night, a late delivery rolled in looking like a first class seat ripped out of 747 and planted on wheels.  He had been sitting in it all morning, without spinal symptoms.

I see two lessons learned from The Chair Man.  First, an entry leveler can find a way to upgrade the standard rolley with a convenient bad back.  Second, you don’t really have to have a bad back to be a pain in the ass.